I don't talk much about this subject on the blog, but thought today would be a good day since it's someone specials birthday.
My parents got divorced when I was really young (I think I was 4). My brother was a newborn. I honestly don't know much about what happened because my mom never discussed it or talked about him in a bad way. I think he just checked out... He never really was a dad to me after that. He promised me things and didn't follow through and I know he didn't pay child support like he was supposed to. I grew up always disappointed by him. And to this day, I call him Steve, not dad.
My mom got remarried when I was in 1st or 2nd grade. I can't remember exactly. He ended up adopting me and my brother (that's where my last name Cooper comes from). Over the years, I started being disappointed by him too. Yes, we had a better relationship than my first dad and I actually called him Daddy. I was in band in middle school and high school and he never once came to any of my concerts, football games, or shows. My mom was at almost every single one. She even flew to Indiana to watch us at a competition. He was not supportive and cared more about himself than anything. When it was time for me to go to nursing school and I had to move to Houston, he told me that he wouldn't pay for me to have an apartment. I remember the conversation like it was yesterday. We were standing in the kitchen and he told me I would have to live in his trailer (he deer hunted and had a trailer they used for that). So, I ended up taking out $20,000 in a private student loan to get me through school the last 2 years and I moved away.
I'm not going to go in to all the dirty details of my family. But they ended up separating and getting divorced during my last year of nursing school. Since then there's been very little contact. He's still my sisters Dad so I try to leave my thoughts to myself because he has tried with her and they still communicate. But with me, as far as I'm concerned, he's not really my dad. He's not even invited to our wedding.
Now on to the more happy part.
My mom got remarried a few years ago. You've heard me talk about my step dad and my mom's husband, etc. Well, that's Tim. My mom's new husband. In the last 5 years that my mom has known him, he has been more of a dad to me than either of my first 2 "dad's". He drove to Houston to help me move all of my stuff out of my ex-fiance's house, he helped with our plumbing and house problems and replaced our hot water heater. He's paying for our wedding....
The main thing is how happy he makes my mom. I feel like I have parents when they're together... not just a mom and a dad doing their own things. We're a family. He's stood by my mom and helped her follow her dream to go to Cosmetology School and truly loves her and she loves him.
That is being a good dad.
He loves me and my sister unconditionally even though we aren't his "real" kids and I can see how happy my mom is now with him.
The topic has come up about who is going to walk me down the aisle at our wedding since I don't have a relationship with my "dads" and I haven't asked him or told him this yet, but I would love it if him and my mom together, my parents, would walk me down the aisle to start my new life with John.
Happy Birthday Tim.
John and I love you and thank you for EVERYTHING you do for us and for making my mom so happy.
I mentioned in this post that I was giving my Bridesmaids their gifts at our couples shower this past weekend. We won't all be together again until we all arrive in Mexico and with all the other decorations and stuff I have to fit in m suitcase, bringing 3 extra bags of goodies just wasn't going to work!
I am really pleased with everything I got for the gifts! I even ordered one of everything for myself too ;)
I was really pleased with how everything turned out!
I can't wait for all of us to use our new bags, beach towels, and tumblers at the resort in December!
The shirts were so/so. I'm glad I did that instead of spending a lot of money getting them made because I know they'll never wear them again. I bought cheap shirts from Target, made the design in Microsoft Word, flipped it, printed it on an iron transfer, then ironed them on. They're not perfect and will probably only last through one washing, but that's ok. They'll be good for us to wear around the resort the day of the wedding and getting our hair done in the spa.
I think my favorite thing are the tumblers! If you've ever been to an All-Inclusive Resort, you know they give you drinks in dinky plastic cups that last about 2 sips then you're done. These are going to be perfect for all of us to fill up with a pina colada and everyone will know we're the bridal party :) And I think these will get used after the wedding too!
I think they were all happy with what they got!
What did you get your bridal party?
And don't forget about the Frat Collection giveaway going on until tonight!